until then ..

An hour ago
I saw you for the last time in person, before I’m gone 
Back to where we’ve been maintaining our relationship
A physically and mentally tiring long-distance relationship  
For these five years

I hate saying good-bye
I hate seeing that agony and fear and pain
flickering in your eyes, though you tried to cover it up
I hoped my tears could hinder me from seeing them 

I hate saying that the wait won’t be long 
It’ll be over you won’t even realize it
When it is damn long,
Every single one of them have been

Is it worth it, I asked you 
Does the wait worth it ?
Does all the tears and sweat, the money and phone calls, the hardship,
worth your time and energy, and love ?

And you said, 
that it’s not about worth, or not,
You don’t even care about it
What you do know is that you love me. That’s it. 

And that’s more than enough for me.

Maybe, if you love someone so much,
you can grow stronger
You can bear difficult times,
and indulge in lovely times. 

That’s what I see in you
You who grow stronger every year, waiting.  
For me.

You are a brave man, my darling.
And I am so honoured to be your girlfriend, again and again
When many have said that they despise this kind of relationship
because as I do, they won’t be able to have that quality time, together.
You keep on striving, for me.

And I am so delighted to say that 
your wait will come to an end. 
That there will be no major separation anymore,
because I am coming home. To you. 

Until then .. 
I’ll try to behave like a good girl,
and please do so with yourself  
Spend this separation time the best we can
And when we are back together, we’ll have a whole load of memories
of what we’ve been doing  

We will cherish the hard works we’ve spent 
We will laugh at our stupidity
We will learn from our mistakes 
We will make a plan on our wedding day (haha ..)

But,
until then ..

to you, Daniel Chandra.
I love you.

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